Goals, and setting goals properly.
This post in particular, I find challenging. We are in a world that loves goals, and loves dreams. It almost seems that modern self-help has taken a page out of the evangelical doctrine of the late 1980's. I'm speaking about a movement that was aptly named the "name it, and claim it" movement. It was a movement that was grounded in the belief that all believers had to do, was name what they wanted, then carry on through life acting like they had already received it. Sound familiar? A person would have to try really hard to avoid modern self-help gurus shouting a derivative of this message from the mountain tops.
Modern (as I will call it) goal-theology tells us that as long as something is on our vision board, the center of our consciousness, something we obsess over, and tell everyone about, it will come true. The ironic part is that the former religious doctrine was shot down due to "religion" which is a catch all reason, however the latter gained a lot of traction.
No, this post isn't just bellyache about goals, I will summarize a solution that I am putting into practice for the New Year, however in the meantime, my period of reflection has shown me a few issues I've realized about our current understanding of goals.
1) While there is much talk about having goals, there is very little talk about what your goal should look like, and whether or not the goal is properly set. For example, consider the following. For many years, my goal was to own a certain special Mercedes Benz by the time I was 35. My issue with goals start right there. If I wanted to (and please don't take this as chest thumping) I could achieve that goal tomorrow. Granted, it would be achieved due to a little (ok, a alot!) of help from a very generous Canadian bank that would HAPPILY loan me the money needed for a mere 5% interest financed over a respectable 84 month finance term. I'm elated, goal reached ... right? I've hit a milestone, crossed something off the bucket-list, and am now a better man. Of course the tone is to be read with a ridiculous amount of sarcasm, my goal is achieved, but it came with the cost of a crippling amount of debt, an insane monthly payment, and maintenance costs I can't afford.
Now to ask the critical question nobody talks about. What really was my goal? Was it to own a flashy fancy car? Or, just maybe ... was the goal to be able to AFFORD said luxurious car? Those are two incredibly different goals, with incredibly different measures to assess their achievement. Do people want to own a yacht, or do they want to be able to afford a yacht? The same goes for vacations, homes, etc. Poorly set goals set poor performance. If you do decide to have a goal, set them smart! Take your goal to the lowest common factor.
2) I personally (once again, not a doctor, I'm just speaking from my own experience) feel something depressing about setting milestones in the future, where I will feel accomplished. How do I know that achieving that goal will give me the sense of belonging, and hope that I desire? How much life will I miss out on today, by focusing 10+ years in the future? Granted I'm on a big trend of taking my life one day at a time, that being said, I do see value in bringing my focus on the day ahead, as opposed to the years to come.
3) Lastly, there is starting to become a lot of realization that goals themselves do not breed good behavior. I recently read an article talking about how the mere act of talking about ones goals gives an individual the same endorphin hit as someone achieving their goal. To make a comparison, the person who shares their dream of climbing Mount Everest, the shoes they'll wear, the photos they will take, has the same endorphin hitting their brain as the individual half-way up the mountain. So I found myself asking, do I want the dream? Or do I want the illusion of action?
All this to say, having targets and a desired outcome is critical. To just float through life day by day may not be the right answer for me. Having something to strive for, and ways I act as a steward with my life is important. So what I will be striving for in the coming year is replacing goals, with a personal strategy.
I find the concept of a strategy forces daily behaviors that will drive to an end. My goal is to save and invest, so daily that means packing lunches, spending responsibly, and now making my own coffee in the office coffee machine drives towards delivery of a strategy. My strategy is to be a good husband, so that drives daily disciplines to achieve that. I have many more strategies, however this is a good example of how the correlate.
Sure, strategies versus goals, we could be arguing over semantics here, however I do believe in the power of word choice, and the power of communication. I do find, after years of conversations, especially this time of year. Not many people set goals that align to a vision they have, not many people use their goals to push for daily disciplines to achieve.
Just a thought ...
Modern (as I will call it) goal-theology tells us that as long as something is on our vision board, the center of our consciousness, something we obsess over, and tell everyone about, it will come true. The ironic part is that the former religious doctrine was shot down due to "religion" which is a catch all reason, however the latter gained a lot of traction.
No, this post isn't just bellyache about goals, I will summarize a solution that I am putting into practice for the New Year, however in the meantime, my period of reflection has shown me a few issues I've realized about our current understanding of goals.
1) While there is much talk about having goals, there is very little talk about what your goal should look like, and whether or not the goal is properly set. For example, consider the following. For many years, my goal was to own a certain special Mercedes Benz by the time I was 35. My issue with goals start right there. If I wanted to (and please don't take this as chest thumping) I could achieve that goal tomorrow. Granted, it would be achieved due to a little (ok, a alot!) of help from a very generous Canadian bank that would HAPPILY loan me the money needed for a mere 5% interest financed over a respectable 84 month finance term. I'm elated, goal reached ... right? I've hit a milestone, crossed something off the bucket-list, and am now a better man. Of course the tone is to be read with a ridiculous amount of sarcasm, my goal is achieved, but it came with the cost of a crippling amount of debt, an insane monthly payment, and maintenance costs I can't afford.
Now to ask the critical question nobody talks about. What really was my goal? Was it to own a flashy fancy car? Or, just maybe ... was the goal to be able to AFFORD said luxurious car? Those are two incredibly different goals, with incredibly different measures to assess their achievement. Do people want to own a yacht, or do they want to be able to afford a yacht? The same goes for vacations, homes, etc. Poorly set goals set poor performance. If you do decide to have a goal, set them smart! Take your goal to the lowest common factor.
2) I personally (once again, not a doctor, I'm just speaking from my own experience) feel something depressing about setting milestones in the future, where I will feel accomplished. How do I know that achieving that goal will give me the sense of belonging, and hope that I desire? How much life will I miss out on today, by focusing 10+ years in the future? Granted I'm on a big trend of taking my life one day at a time, that being said, I do see value in bringing my focus on the day ahead, as opposed to the years to come.
3) Lastly, there is starting to become a lot of realization that goals themselves do not breed good behavior. I recently read an article talking about how the mere act of talking about ones goals gives an individual the same endorphin hit as someone achieving their goal. To make a comparison, the person who shares their dream of climbing Mount Everest, the shoes they'll wear, the photos they will take, has the same endorphin hitting their brain as the individual half-way up the mountain. So I found myself asking, do I want the dream? Or do I want the illusion of action?
All this to say, having targets and a desired outcome is critical. To just float through life day by day may not be the right answer for me. Having something to strive for, and ways I act as a steward with my life is important. So what I will be striving for in the coming year is replacing goals, with a personal strategy.
I find the concept of a strategy forces daily behaviors that will drive to an end. My goal is to save and invest, so daily that means packing lunches, spending responsibly, and now making my own coffee in the office coffee machine drives towards delivery of a strategy. My strategy is to be a good husband, so that drives daily disciplines to achieve that. I have many more strategies, however this is a good example of how the correlate.
Sure, strategies versus goals, we could be arguing over semantics here, however I do believe in the power of word choice, and the power of communication. I do find, after years of conversations, especially this time of year. Not many people set goals that align to a vision they have, not many people use their goals to push for daily disciplines to achieve.
Just a thought ...
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